And Another Movie

 Life is really marching on rather the same this week.

I ended this day grabbing another movie off the Netflix list and loved it so much.  Just like the Queen's Gambit, this was one that I couldn't imagine would interest me.  It just overwhelmed me from the very beginning, the Suffolk countryside right at the beginning of the war; excellent actors and actresses - Ralph Fiennes and Lily James for two; music and photography just perfect for the time.  I did cry, which is the mark of a good movie to me, but I smiled more.  This shows that movies are still able to be made that tell a story, another true story, that are pleasing to look at with no bad language, no blood or violence, no screaming matches - just scenes that make you glad you can pause and go back and watch more than once.  Oh, the movie is The Dig.

Luna the cat is sick, and no one knows what's the matter with her.  She's stopped eating and getting up and seems to be uncomfortable when you pick her up.  She spent the late afternoon and early evening at Aerowood Animal Emergency Center in Bellevue where they found absolutely nothing wrong with her.  We think it's all in her head, and she's picked up on all my anxiety!  We're two of a kind except I will eat and don't feel like sleeping in a box.

I did most of my exercises but am not pleased with my effort.  I know I'm improving, but I'm not happy with things yet.  

Tomorrow is Emily's birthday, and I'm determined to get myself over to Steller and see my girls.

She's 6 years old here, just the age of Katherine.  There is a pretty close resemblance.  And look at me!  Making her birthday cake and even place cards - and this for the third child!

Adding this for the "now" picture.

A 4 and a 3.  Good times.  Compared to my 43rd year when I had three teenagers at the same time.

Julie and Julia

 I'm not sure how I missed this movie or whether I have ever thought about watching it, but it was the perfect movie for me at this particular time.

I went to Netflix with nothing special in mind, just looking for a little escape, and the first suggestion was this movie.  It may have just come out on Netflix, but I didn't even hesitate or watch the trailer.  I just pushed PLAY.

What a joyous and amazing movie.  I never expected it to be that good.  Of course, with Meryl Streep, how bad could it be.  There are two true stories:  Julia Child and Julie Powell, a generation apart.  Both actresses were perfect in their respective roles as well as their husbands and various other characters.  I've never been a fan of French cooking but have watched many of the Cooking with Julia shows on Saturday mornings on PBS.  Meryl nailed her.   

So glad I found a little distraction that made me laugh and cry and left me a little hungry and almost brave enough to try Julia's Bouef Bourguignon.  It looks perfectly doable.

I used to make a similar dish called Ragout A L'Improviste when I had the extra time and a little red wine, and it was really a treat.  

From the burned corners, this looks like it was in a cookbook rescued from the fire.

This brings back memories of being left in Grady's kitchen in Trion to spend most of the afternoon making this while Mike and Grady went off and did whatever they liked to do.  I didn't mind spending the day reading and cooking, but this was before children when days seemed long with a big dinner planned with friends later on.  So many years ago!

Back from Bleakness

 I like saying that, although sometimes life still seems a little bleak.  I don't feel like saying much here any more.  Maybe when I get a little bit more of my life back, I'll feel like taking pictures and keeping up with my life.  Right now, it's PT twice a week and sometimes other doctor's visits thrown in.

It was an especially uncomfortable week last week, seeing the surgeon, getting another x-ray, having PT twice and getting my first vaccine.  Someone expressed surprise that I didn't have a sore arm, but my left arm is going to have to have a lot more abuse that a little injection to make me sit up and take notice.  I hope the second dose on the 13th goes as well as the first.

I got praise from the surgeon on my arm progress, but it sure doesn't seem like I can do what he wants without pain.  He said it would take 9 months to get back to close to normal.  Laura gave me a few more exercises Tuesday, and I've forced myself to do them as much as I can.  There are a lot of them, a lot of repetitions, and a lot of pushing past the pain level, so there's boredom mixed in with the discomfort.  It was nice to have Emily here Sunday afternoon coaching me on the broomstick exercise that I can't seem to get, but she poked me a lot more than Laura ever does.  My sweet babies got to visit too, so that made it all worth while.  

Except for going to the car and mailbox, it's been too cold/windy/rainy to enjoy much outside.  Noreen brought us some chicken lemon orzo soup the other day, and that was worth getting out for!  We've decided walking from my steps to the mailbox is a perfectly fine outing for us right now.  It's nice to be able to ride in the new(er) car with heated seats and new gadgets that I don't know anything about yet.  I might try driving around a little bit this weekend, but I won't be going out of town, so I'll still have to count on Elise to take me.

I'm about to leave to be manhandled in a few minutes.  Maybe I can think of a surprise for Elise and me for the trip home after that 45 minutes of wishing it were over.  Maybe I'll run into Emily today.  She was there Tuesday but didn't know I was there since my usual day is on Monday.  She was treating patients in the room next to mine, but we didn't hear each other the whole time.  

I don't think I even have any pictures on my camera to post, so I'll try to take some today.  

I sent Emily this picture of Luna snoozing in my lap the other night.  

At Emily's suggestion, I did try this, and it was super easy and exciting to wait for the delivery on blustery cold nights.

The cold things were cold, the fruit and veggies fresh, and even the one freezer item was frozen nicely. 

It's not like shopping for specials and using coupons, but the prices aren't a lot different from Safeway.  I've only done small orders until I make sure I know what I'm doing, and everything ordered has arrived exactly in the time frame I pick.  You can even track the driver on the app.  I will do that some more.

Elise and I did stop at Safeway Tuesday.  It was hard to get out in the strong wind, but we were glad we did.  The Mount Si Senior Center in North Bend had sent all us "seniors" from the area a $100 gift certificate for groceries last month - such a nice gesture - and we got most of what we needed with that plus a few extra things for the food bank.

Back in an hour or so maybe.

And it's good to be back.  It was a good morning overall.  My photo opportunities were rare since there are usually people all around, so I took just a few.  

Not too exciting, but here's the passenger view of the new car.  Elise is enjoying driving it, and we're learning.  I didn't get the manual, but it's in the mail, so I should be able to figure some things out.  

The only thing interesting in the elevator at Proliance.

That's our girl.

The long walk to the clinic doesn't bother me since I'm not one of those in the complicated-looking leg apparatuses (not apparati - I looked it up).

Emily came into the waiting room to get her next patient, and he got to meet the famous "momma."  

I enjoyed laughing and talking with Laura, but all the lovely conversation couldn't make up for all the stiffness and pain.  I got a few more exercises added to the regimen, some hard and some not.  I plan to give it a lot of attention this weekend.  I did see a young lady doing the broomstick exercise today, and she didn't seem to be grimacing as much as I do.  She was a lot younger though.  I told Laura my shoulder muscles might not ever have been as loose as she's trying to make them.

So we're safely home with lunch eaten and the nagging feeling I need a nap.  Elise is sorting pictures for me, so maybe I'll join her and try to stay awake until bedtime.  I had a cat head-butting me at 2:30 this morning, so I was looking for her a bird or fish video to distract her when she accidentally called someone.  No harm done. They didn't notice!

I can't find even one more interesting or even half-interesting thing in my life to talk about.  The fact that the little dictator's cult members are still bowing down to him is not so much interesting as disgusting.  It seems to be okay that he tricked them into believing there was a fraudulent election and that he incited them to insurrection.  Nothing to see there - just a day in the life of the unhinged.  Do the Republicans not have anyone else decent to be their standard bearer, or are they all too afraid of him to hold him accountable for his atrocities?  Sad, sad, sad.

Another thing sad to me is that trump followers who are so concerned about "faux news" consistently post articles on social media that are easily fact checked and found to be false, misleading, photoshopped, or otherwise altered to represent what they wish were true.  You can bet if it comes from Fox or Breitbart or Newsmax or whatever those opinion sources are, you can easily find the truth elsewhere - if it's important to do so, that is.  Obviously, the truth doesn't seem to matter as long as it suits their agenda of belittling the first legitimate leader we've had in four years.   It amazes me that those who put up with trump's pathological lying for all these years will invent something - anything - to try to make it look like biden is lying too.  Everyone lies and misrepresents facts in politics, a well-known fact, just not on an hourly basis like the former president.  Seems like all that "unity" talk was just talk.  And what else is new?  I guess it's the new popularity of politicians talking about killing members of the opposite party and making threats to their family members.  What an embarrassment for our country.  I know I should ignore these news items that pop up on my computer, but I do like to remain informed, even when it's awful.  I'm interested in knowing the truth, not excusing crooks and liars, and there are so few to choose from in our government where power and lucrative careers are top priority, not the people who actually make up our country.

But here comes a warm kitty to cheer me up.

I just ran across this photo from the Christmas the Win-Bins spent with us in Montgomery.  It's always been one of my favorites.  Both of these girls will be having birthdays within the next couple of weeks.

Cats and babies.  Two things guaranteed to take my mind off the state of our country and the horror of the pandemic.

Sunshine and Hope

 In more ways than one, today is a bright and optimistic day.  It certainly can't get much worse - for our country, for our people, even personally.  I'm ready for new thoughts and new hope.

I'm tired of being angry because of a would-be dictator trying to take over and divide our country.  For all the people still supporting the racism and lies, the anger and vengeance and lack of common decency that are hallmarks of the former president, I have nothing else to say.  I don't care who in the world people vote for - what party they belong it, what religion they belong to, what their favorite foods are - but the people who still support this man and his ideals, I don't really have enough in common with you to even carry on a conversation.  If his supporters don't believe in his ideas and his policies, why are they still spreading the lies about a free and fair election being taken away?  Do they believe one man's lies above all common sense?  Or have they bought into the conspiracy theories that any thinking person can discredit with a little research?  His propaganda goes a long way with people who can't think for themselves.  

We still may not make it as a country, but we did dodge a potential crisis on January 6th.  I have no idea how the new president and his policies will work out.  I do have faith that Biden will work as hard as he can and not be caught up in petty games and tantrums.  I think I know that much about the man.  In fact, I can't think of many people who would have been allowed to wreak havoc for 4 years and allowed to do so uncurtailed like the former president, and let's hope we never have to see anything like this again.  

This is a new beginning in so many ways.  I'm nearly six weeks out from my surgery and, if I'm lucky, may get the green light to drive Friday.  I have a new car sitting outside my garage just waiting for my first trip.  I hope I still remember how to drive.  Scary.  I'm sure the day I get permission to drive, we'll have that big snow that I keep hearing about.  It's okay.  I can wait.

Tomorrow afternoon, if all goes well, I'll get my first dose of the Covid vaccine, which is the first step in getting my life even more back to normal.  Once I get the second dose, and if we still practice safety measures, I'll be able to pick up the girls from school on Wednesday and actually spend some time with them.  We'll have a ton of stuff to catch up on.  It's been hard to follow the guidelines for being safe, but when you look at the overall picture, it will all have been worth it if we come out ahead in this fight with the pandemic.

It still disappoints me when I see how people are politicalizing mask-wearing and just common safety measures.  I'm really pretty proud of being scared enough of contracting a deadly disease that I don't feel like "they" are taking my freedom away by asking me to protect myself and others.  I have life still to live.

So there's hope around me.  I'm going to start petitioning for an apartment on the first floor.  I probably won't be so scared of stairs after a while, but maybe it's time.  I'll have to give up a bedroom and my balcony, but I look to gain some other things - like entry through a garage instead of going around to the side of the building and a small porch for my rocking chairs!  I'm praying those little things work out and that it's a nice peaceful spring and summer.  

These simple pictures are really a big deal for me.  I've been forced to wear a sling now for nearly two months or suffer painful consequences moving my arm away from my body.

Just looking at the bottom pictures agonized me for a few days, but now I'm pretty excited that I can do a little bit of it.

 Getting a little help from Bowie, although I think he's more interested in those tassels.

Off to the grocery store now.  

I've Had Better Januaries

 From the very beginning, this month was horrible with the insurrection and the usual infighting and blaming everyone else for what has happened to our country.  No chance of that being settled - ever, probably.

Personally, I'm just staying inside when I can and avoiding the weather.  No snow this year but just constant rain day and night for what seems like weeks with the culmination of the windstorms.  According to WA news sources, the Seattle area had up to 70 MPH winds that knocked out power for half a million people, and we were included.  It's the first time in my five years here that the power has done more than just flicker, but this time it was the real thing.

I didn't enjoy it.  Sometimes in the past when we had power outages in the South, we would enjoy candles and flashlights and roughing it, but now we're so attached to our phones and the internet that it made it quite miserable to keep things charged enough for what passes for normal now.  Elise would go to the car and sit there while our phones charged, but then with no WIFI, there was nothing to do.  I didn't feel like reading by candlelight or cleaning house much, so I dozed in front of the fire and communicated with the family some and tried to get a little creative with meals, using up the refrigerator things that would tend to spoil and keeping the freezer door closed.  I drank a lot of milk and ate a lot of fruit and salads.  

There was no coffee because everything in this apartment except the fireplace is electric, and there were no businesses open in the three towns near us.  People were driving 15 miles for a cup of coffee.  Emily and Ryan have a gas stove, but I didn't even ask for anything hot from there.  I was just mainly annoyed and kept thinking about all that food Elise had bought for the freezer the night before and how hard it was going to be to throw most of it out.  

The cats were perfectly content since their food comes from cans or bags, the fire was on a lot, and their people were there for extra padding while they slept.

So it was a happy thing when I was awakened at 2:04 yesterday morning with bright lights and music.

On top of all that, Elise was exposed to Covid, and therefore I was exposed if she tested positive, so we had to stay even more isolated.  It all turned out good, but I had to miss a whole week of PT because of it.  The good thing is that my arm feels great, and Emily will come over tomorrow and work on it a little bit.  The bad thing is I may have regressed muscle and movement wise, and it will be tough next week.  

We spent most of the day yesterday catching up on laundry and cleaning, and it's a good feeling to be on top of things now and able to put those candles away.  

I also caught up on the news, and it's just so much to comprehend.  I'm amazed at how many people think storming the U.S. Capitol was a good and even necessary thing.  And why?  Because one person decided our national election was a fraud and sowed the seeds of doubt in the millions of people who follow the dictator and are unable to think for themselves.  The dictator has his party to back him up.  Not because they actually believe there was fraud but because they are terrified that the dictator will punish them and that his rabid followers will keep them out of power.  I can't even comprehend it.  And then, because the leader and his backers say it, it must be true, and therefore ALL the sheep believe our election was a sham.

I was encouraged by an article I read this morning by Michael Gerson (Trump's Evangelicals were Implicit in the Desecration of our Democracy).  I can't seem to link it, nor do I agree with every word in this opinion piece, but I have for four years now wondered how Christians could back someone like Trump who stands for everything evil that our belief in God decries.  And not only back but worship him as their political savior to the point of dividing the country even more and actively making anyone who disagrees with them the enemy. I found out months ago that because I was not a Trump supporter, I was a "son of satan," according to someone I used to look up to as a wonderful Christian.

 I've thought all along that when Franklin Graham sold his soul to politics, he would lead many Christians down the wrong path, just because of profiting from his father's name.  If hating anyone who is not exactly like you is what people are looking for, they've found their hero in Trump.  If you're black, Muslim, foreign, gay, and non-white, you're the enemy.  If Trump says it (even if the majority of what he says is lies), you believe it - lying, revenge, hatred, racism. How did people come to those conclusions?  I'm still wondering.  I'm still seeing people I once looked up to as devout Christians completely buy into conspiracy theories and completely "drink the Kool-aid" of the cult.  No thinking for themselves or questioning the dictator, just marching right along and parroting what they hear.  

I dread hearing what might happen in the future if trump keeps the power he has over people.  There is enough evil in the world without an organized effort to channel it, and it's certainly being channeled now.  I look at the faces of the people who have been arrested in the insurrection, and I see nothing but hatred and craziness.  Each individual person most likely has a fairly normal life and a family and probably some goodness, but swept along by this insanity, they become animals, and it's terrifying.  All because of an unhinged leader that they insisted can do no wrong and have excused for four years.  

Maybe January will end better than it started.  I'm just laying low and trying to get myself healthy again.  I'm waiting to drive again and hold my coffee with my right hand.  Waiting to be able to start on my quilts again.  Waiting on this winter to end.  Waiting.  Waiting on normal stuff and a little more sanity that we have in our government right now.  Surely it can't get worse.  

This Can't Be Real Life

 I thought things were bad when I posted a couple of days ago, but it's unreal how things progressed.  Actions I never thought I would see in a free country, our country.

I watched some interviews today on whether the "patriots" were proud of what had been done to the Capitol, and there are people, many people, who are proud and still think they are fighting for freedom from having the 2020 election "stolen."    I don't have time to read everything, but I'm sure it gets worse.

There are people so ignorant that they bought into one man's statements that the election was rigged.  One man but with the help of his weak and cowardly party members and with a lot of help from the propaganda on his conspiracy networks.  I wonder if Fox News and Newswatch and I don't even know the names of these so-called news stations will ever have to own up to the people they fooled into going along with the misinformation and the absolute lies trump spoke every day.  I'm sure the people who hang onto every word will not be swayed by what is really happening but only what they are told is happening.

The cult is strong.  I'm sure that there are millions of people who still think the election was rigged and that their corrupt leader deserved to have four more years of chaos.  Although many courts and many lawyers and even the Supreme Court examined all the details and could find nothing in the election that would change the outcome of the people's choice for president, I'm afraid there is no hope.  I'm sorry to live in close proximity to these people.  It's scary.  The hatred for former President Obama and his wife and for Hilary Clinton and Nancy Pelosi and all Bidens and anything Democratic is just so out of hand that I feel like there will be much, much more to come. 

I'm angry, and I don't need to harbor all this anger.  I just wonder at what point a dictator becomes real and a threat to a country and its people.  I think we've almost found out.  I just pray that we get through the next few days until we have a new president without further tragedy, although the would-be dictator promises we haven't seen the last of him.  

I had a good but exhausting day yesterday with my appointments and decisions, but I'm feeling pretty hopeless today and just stunned.  I need to be alone and try to keep my blood pressure under control and trust that we have people in charge who can get us through this mess.

Speechless

 I have been pretty much speechless for a month, at least in print, because it's so hard to control my right arm without hurting it some.  I decided today would be a good day to write something and get back to living fairly normally.

But I made the mistake of watching the elector certification debates early.  It was silly just listening to supposedly intelligent people posture and pretend to be outraged about the election results and only to please a clown president with no morals and no grasp of reality.

I had a few things to do today and was in and out and had some phone conversations and came back to find an attack on the Capitol by "protesters" who couldn't resist obeying their king and actually showing the country how loyal and devoted they are by an act of violence.

There was a day in 2016 when I went to visit my mother in the nursing home.  I think it was the day after the election of Trump.  I had never called myself a Democrat or a Republican and always voted for the person I thought would do the best job of running our country, after lots of reading of opinions and asking questions, etc.

But even I, with no more knowledge than I had at the time, knew what a mistake it was for this man to be entrusted with our country.  It scared me to death.  I tried to find one person who voted for him to tell me why they did so, but I never did get an answer.  It turned out that he developed an unwavering cult following where no one much cared what he did and found his daily lies and atrocities adorable.  He was backed and excused by his own TV show, Fox News, so people who watched only that show were told how wonderful he was daily and how evil the "media" was to actually check his speeches for misinformation.

It was a feeling of relief to know he was not going to be allowed to do any more damage to democracy and our country, but we all knew that it would get worse before it got better. The attack on the election process was relentless, and even after his 60 lawsuits were thrown out, he was still able to convince his sheep-like followers that there was rampant cheating in the voting system.  There was nothing found, and it was pretty much considered to be the smoothest election in years.  But that doesn't matter.  Millions of people choose to believe this person over professionals and even the Supreme Court.  I can't even imagine this.

All this is well documented and said in much better words than I can express, but I'm comforted by hearing Democrats and Republicans alike with one voice tonight decrying a dangerous and unhinged individual and praying for healing of the division in our country and for the damage that has been done.  

I would love for the country to run smoothly for a while and for the leaders to be able to concentrate their efforts on getting rid of the pandemic and not have to hear the latest tantrums and crazy tweeting of a president who didn't even pretend to do his job.

I know it won't be a perfect world, but it has to be better than it has been.  I'm looking forward to getting my vaccination along with everyone else and getting back to some semblance of living a normal life.

I have a lot of work to do before I can even pick up anything or raise my harm above my hand - a LOT.  But I plan to give it my best and try to do what I'm told.  I also face a new problem with atrial fibrillation and will find out the plans for that tomorrow.  Sometimes I just wake up in the middle of the night worrying about the future and wondering how I will handle things.  I hear it's normal to have this anxiety after a trauma or an illness, but I'm ready for it to go away.

I got to spend some sweet time with my girls last weekend, and it was lovely.  Just their voices and the feel of their hair and their hands!  I've missed the every-day togetherness we once had.

They had come over to open a special gift from Carol and David, and they were thrilled over their elf soap and beautiful ornaments.

The cats are doing their best to help us bring in the Christmas decorations and get them stored away.

And although I can't drive it yet, I now have a new-er car.  It was driven from Idaho over Snoqualmie Pass in a snowstorm on New Year's Day.  Quite an adventure, and I know I'm going to enjoy it.  The family drove by to say hello and let me approve of my new ride.  I think it's cute.

I was clearing off some of the many drawings I had on my refrigerator and noticed this depiction of my surgery by Graysen.  She has the "nail" correct, for sure.

It hurts me to look at this!  But I'm glad Dr. Marshall knows what he's doing.

I'm not sure I'll have that much to say in the coming days, but maybe some (good) interesting things will happen!