My StoryWorth question for this week was: What Things Do You Think You Cannot Live Without.
At first, I seriously named the things that I can't physically live without and then started thinking about the things I would find it hard to live without and be happy.
So I made quite an extensive list. I'm finding it hard to keep myself in a happy place lately, and so naming these things made me seem not quite as bad off as I see myself some days, so I thought I would copy them here, so I don't lose my ability to see my blessings.
And it beats complaining.
The things that give me pleasure nowadays are:
A quiet place to sit and think and read - and nap.
A warm clean bed to get into every night.
Children who love to read and love to have me read them stories.
Kissable cheeks and hugs and expressions of love from my babies.
Family members who are so comforting and comfortable to talk to honestly and without reservation.
The library and being able to get any book I might want to read in a very short time, sometimes the next day.
Money. The security that Mike left me so I won't have to be dependent on others and the ability to earn a little bit more.
Coffee and mocha creamers and the quiet time to be able to drink it any time I want to. Cinnamon roll coffee during the holidays.
Technology and the little bit of it that I understand that's changed my life.
Phone that I fight with but that allows me to be in touch with anyone almost any time.
Computer - my new one that allows me to work with pleasure now and go anywhere I want to and learn anything I want to.
Friends, although very few of them that I really talk to any more. Enough though and good ones.
Necessities when I need them - toilet paper, soap, toothpaste, deodorant, lotion.
A safe place to live.
Warm/hot showers and clean towels to dry off with.
The ability to have comfortable shoes and clothes and warm coats and gloves.
Smiles and kindness from strangers.
Laughs and giggles from children - my babies' the most precious.
Good schools for the girls with excellent teachers.
A snuggly kitty cat and good memories of all pets I've loved in the past.
Logic problems and puzzles.
Freedom and the ability to live without fear.
Inside jokes with family.
Conveniences like the microwave, dishwasher, instant heat, car, credit cards, ATM machines.
Ability to fly without too much anxiety.
Good care to keep Mama comfortable.
Memories of parents, grandparents, in-laws that make me smile.
Memories of Mike that keep me going every day and the ability to talk to him when I have a problem.
Faith in God and faith in myself, although shaky, that is still there.
A mind that lets me learn new things every day and shows me new ways of looking at things.
A good sense of humor.
Weather - all kinds except extreme heat and cold. Rain (luckily), nice windstorms, thunder when I can get it, a little snow (but just a little), springtime warmth.
Comforting things, like my soft throw, down comforter, fuzzy warm socks, my favorite coffee mugs and favorite coffees.
Good health - for the most part - and the ability to get out of bed every day.
This is a long list, but I know there are other things I enjoy and can live without - but would find it hard. I guess a blessing list.
Now for the complaining!
I've gotten more forgetful lately, and it's bothering me. I know it's having too much on my mind, because my thinking is usually clear. I just really started doubting myself these past couple of days. Yesterday, we forgot Graysen's backpack and lunch box. I know it's up to her to pick it up on the way out, but I'm still supposed to be there to remind her. We still had time to go back and get it and arrive at school on time.
Yesterday when I took them home at 5:00, I forgot her backpack at the apartment. No problem. I would just take it over to the house the next morning. And, of course, I ran out this morning in such a hurry that I forgot it - because I had hidden my glasses from Layla who likes to knock them off the table - and then I forgot where I hid them, so I was running a bit late.
Again, no problem, we would stop by the apartment on the way to school and pick it up. We got all dressed and out the door and halfway there when I realized I had not only left Graysen's lunch, library books, and water bottle but also Katherine's lunch box and water bottle on the couch. So back to the house - talking all the time about how it was okay, we were not going to be late, Mimi is just having a crazy day.
Ran in, got all those things, went to the apartment and brought down the backpack, packed Graysen's lunch and books into the backpack and got her to school on time. Then delivered Katherine (over protests) to school. But got honked at because I refused to turn left in front of an oncoming car and made the car behind me have to wait an extra 10 seconds. I knew I could have made it, but it seems rude to me and a little dangerous to cut in front of a car going full speed, and I shouldn't let it bother me, but it just added to the morning's doubt. After I took Katherine in and left her happy in her fox dress, I just sat in the car and cried - not much but just let the whole stressful morning out.
At times like this, I forget all the good things and just concentrate on the bad, so it was good that I decided to get my StoryWorth writing out of the way before Sunday. It does make me realize all the good things I have in life.
Just to end with a funny. The girls and I turned Layla's Chewy box into a fort with little windows and toys inside, but she hardly ever used it, and it's really not pretty in the living room, so I decided to take it apart and put it in the recycle bin.
But, of course, cat-like, it was much more interesting to her in the current state.
Too bad, Layla. You've lost your fort. She had to go in Time Out yesterday, her carrier, because Katherine was trying to paint, and cats and little cups of water do not go well together.
She also stayed there during lunch, because that little tray is where the girls like to eat, but didn't seem to mind it at all. She never fussed about it and just sat there and watched us. Maybe she needs a Time Out from people sometimes.
Later on that day, Katherine was mad with me about my insisting she pick up her toys. K: You're mean to me, Mimi. I'm going to tell my Mama, and she's going to be sad at you. M: That's okay. Mama wants you to pick up your toys too. K: Well, then I'm never going to eat breakfast with you again, and I'm never going to eat that soup you gave me for lunch. I'm only going to eat Paw Patrol cookies here and bananas and apple slices and yo-gret. And a foot stomp for emphasis.
I love her so much and try not to be too mean.
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