Sunday, July 16, 2017

Learning

Sometimes when I don't come here and write something often enough (for me), I start to feel stressed and wonder why I even bother.  Then I realize I do it only for myself to preserve my memories, and if someone else reads them and enjoys my ride, so much the better.  When Mike was living in Texas and me in Alabama, I did it so he would know what was going on back home - and he came to really depend on it and fuss at me if I missed writing for awhile.  Now I have 2 sweet babies that I'm doing it for.  I think they will enjoy reading about Mimi's life one day - which is really about theirs!

I have a whole list of blogs I read listed to the right, and I love every one of them.  Most of them have things to offer me in terms of learning new things or giving me ideas.  I have so many interests that some days I will jump on the quilting blogs and other days on the sewing or organizing ones - less frequently on the decorating ones since I don't have much to work with there!  No one could read my blog and learn anything.  I jump from sewing to books and movies to grandchildren to recipes - usually in the same post.  Just the way my mind works, jumping from one thought to the other.

I'm still trying to learn what I'm going to be and do with the rest of my life.  One month from now, I will have been alone for a year.  Mike went into the hospital right before his birthday, around August 16th, and I had only a couple of conversations with him after that.

It's been the hardest thing I've ever had to do, and I don't foresee it being a whole lot better for a long time.  Things are easier though.  I'm learning.

I've learned to appreciate solitude.  It's really never been a problem for me, and I'm not one to have to have people around me to be happy.  The thing I miss is someone comfortable to share thoughts with and enjoy things with and see things through the other's eyes.  Some of the sweetest moments last year were when one of the children would do something especially cute or precocious, and I would meet Mike's eyes, and we would get these big smiles on our faces.  I knew he knew what I was thinking (Has there ever been a child so clever and precious?), and we were in complete agreement.

I had a little taste of that when we were at the beach in May.  Ryan's mother Millie - my grandchildren's other grandmother - could sit around and talk and talk about these wonderful beings forever, and neither one of us would ever get tired of it.  We knew anything we noticed or mentioned about them would be savored by the other one.  I just wish we could have more time together.

This fall I will have some partial days off, and I want to see what I can do to get more enjoyment out of my situation.  I've met a new friend who also lives alone, and we share the love of our grandchildren for sure.  Our daughters are friends, and we're making plans to meet for lunch and see what else we have in common.  We also share the same sense of humor, so that's a big deal to me - to laugh with someone, even if it is about ourselves.

As far as sewing, I once again have a dozen projects started - in my head.  Things I need to finish mainly.  I had a stack of patterns in a box that I want to get rid of, and Graysen happened to find them.  I think I'm in trouble.  At first, she wanted a Tinkerbell costume, but then she saw a blue evening gown that she loved, loved, loved.  I did't particular like it - the reason for getting rid of the pattern - but she was fascinated.


She especially loves the way the little girl is lifting her long skirt up.

When she asked so plaintively and sweetly - many times - if I would make one for her, there is no way I wouldn't at least give it a try.  I happen to have some beautiful pink fabric that our friend Rosanne used for tablecloths for Graysen's 3rd birthday party.  She gave it to me after the party, and I've been saving it for the right time.  Yards and yards of it!



The problem is, Graysen has her heart set on a BLUE dress, not a pink one.  Emily and I stroked the fabric and praised it and tried to change her mind, but she is pretty adamant about the blue.  I think with time, if I don't show her the picture again and if I go ahead make the pink, she will love it too.  I even have some sparkly sheer fabric for the sleeves and back skirt.


So that's going to probably be done before I start their quilts.  I had planned to make Graysen one for her double bed, but since we don't know what the sleeping arrangements will be in a few years, Emily and I decided it would be good to make each girl a twin quilt just alike.  

I have the fabric from Riley Blake's "Dream and a Wish" - A layer cake, a stack of fat quarters, and several yards of particular fabrics. 



A pretty good selection of princesses, ball gowns, carriages, and castles.  Let's just hope their princess fascination lasts awhile.  Four years ago, I would never have thought I would wish that!


I'm going to use this pattern by Amy Smart.'

 

I need to go read some of my organizing blogs - especially time management - and get busy on some of these projects.  

I did do this though.  I don't have a before picture - thank goodness, because it's a little scary.  This is the guest room/playroom, and it helps to have at least this much off the floor and kind of organized.  It's still an ongoing process.  Each of the blue bins holds all those elusive little pieces of Legos, Little People, and teeny tiny animals.  


I wonder how long it will take Katherine to find a way to get to that glue on top.  I put together the cubes and really like them and would do another set, but those sliding doors wouldn't allow good access.

All the dolls from long ago along with the bunkbeds, high chair and suitcase played with my Emily and Elise.


Also costumes from dance recitals in the 1980s and 90s.  There is another storage unit with drawers for doll clothes, but so far, the girls are too small to do more than undress them and mess up their hair (and love them).  


After the Binderts take their trip to South Dakota and I take my trip to Alabama, we will settle into our fall schedule.  I will take both girls to school on Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays at 9 and pick them up at 3 - giving me plenty of time to make appointments or sew or do what I want to do in the middle part of the day.  Then I will have them all day on Tuesday and Thursday.  It sounds like a good arrangement to me.

This was a good week, spent doing just what we wanted to do - a lot of outside play and visits to the park.  The girls fuss over toys a lot but then will play happily together for long periods of time.  I think that will only get better as they get a little older.  I'm not rushing my baby time - well, maybe just a little.  I can't believe I've gotten to spend the sweetest times with the girls - while they still think I'm almost perfect.  They both look sympathetically at my brown spots on my arms and hands and the wrinkles on my neck - and want to fix them.  If only you could fix that with love!

Those baby hands!  But getting bigger every day.  Graysen loved this fallen begonia and wanted me to take a picture of her holding it.  


It made her sad that it had to leave its family.


She and Emily came over to swim in the apartment pool for a little while, although I'm not sure how people can stand a pool with these temperatures.  They do enjoy it though!

When I got there, I saw her in the little hot tub with her new friends - 2 brothers and a sister.  Their mom had given them all popsicles, and she was having a good time.  



I had been freezing and wearing a sweatshirt all morning, but I sat in the sunshine for awhile and thawed somewhat.  

I came back and sat on the balcony with a cup of tea and Miss Molly.  Not even a hummingbird visitor could make her open her eyes.


New to the balcony are the first nasturtium bloom


 And 2 marble-sized tomatoes.


A cute moment when Katherine discovered the light reflection from the blinds on the table.
"Cat in the eggs."



I used a different picture for my Facebook profile picture, but I thought this one was pretty too, with the clouds completely covering the mountains.  




No comments:

Post a Comment